The End

This Spring, in addition to starting a graduate program, I had a series of ridiculously complex hoops to jump through to renew my teaching certificate. Hours of writing, collecting student work as evidence, and a lengthy editing and revising process have all led to this moment of pure freedom. As of last night, I'm done. There were moments when I seriously questioned changing careers to avoid the whole thing.

Some friends and I went out last night to celebrate with Poutine and a sad Polish movie---was too full and I cried. But I woke up this morning feeling absolutely free. FREE!!

During the school year, my work is never done, weekends and nights are never really time off from my job. If I'm not grading or lesson planning I'm feeling guilty and knowing I'm going to regret it later.  It's not an exaggeration to say that I'm always working---I just can't seem to relax. And it's gotten worse during the last 9 years I've been teaching. Once I realized how much better I was at my job when I got to school an hour before it started and left 4 hours after, it's like it became my new normal and I couldn't go back. When I get home I usually spend the hour before I fall asleep emailing parents or administrators. I'm usually thinking about how to turn cool things I see or read into innovative lessons. I scan the internet for silly science cartoons to put on my tests and pepper into my powerpoints. I'm become crazed with TED Ed videos and watch them like Saturday morning cartoons with bowls of cereal in the morning hoping to find the gems that might make learning sort-of interesting. And Sunday nights are the worst. The absolute worst.

I always forget what summer feels like---it's like no other feeling. It's three in the afternoon and I'm still in my pajamas. I know it's Saturday and maybe I could do that any Saturday, but it's different. Because I know that all the days are Saturdays now.